There was one time
I’ll tell you son
I opened a gate
And found no fun
Shopping on Craigslist
Is sometimes quite bright
Other times
It can bring on a fright
Jay needed a car
One with much muscle
That shouldn’t have been tough
I’d no idea I would tussle
We headed for Lynnwood
A Dodge Challenger to see
It wasn’t too pricey
Yet far from free
The house looked deserted
A meth lab by look
I saw the car Jay wanted
Parked off in a nook
So I opened the gate
And to the door went
I knocked on the door
Avoiding the dent
While still on the landing
A movement I spied
A black and red dog
I had just eyed
A Doberman Pinscher
Can be quite frightening
Jay thought the same
And departed like lightning
It was a male
So I wasn’t too worried
I laughed at Jay
For the way that he scurried
The dog came to me
A-wagging his stub
He was so friendly
Him, I couldn’t snub
On the door I did knock
Once more for good measure
Jay’s cowardess, at
I chuckled with pleasure
Then once again
That movement I spied
A red and black dog
I almost cried
This one was different
It wasn’t a he
The mate of the other
A new mother, she
I knew from close looking
Through preceding years
Of vicious dog mommies
It had rekindled old fears
I held myself frozen
Doing math in my head
I was betting on if
Would I escape if I fled
My normal tactic
Would most likely have been
To tell Jay to run
Knowing she’d seek his skin
Unfortunately then
My plans had been foiled
Jay had run early
His undies unsoiled
The long moment of tension
It finally broke
She charged right at me
Though I did not provoke
Her teeth came in low
But I bolted high
I sprinted for fence
And prayed to the sky
Twenty yards left to go
To the gate open wide
Then Jay did close it
I almost cried
He saw me coming
But the dog he saw too
So he closed the gate
That’s what he did do
The fence was a low one
Three feet, maybe four
I hoped I could hurdle
I hurdled before
I focused on goal
I accelerated
I didn’t know
To what I was fated
My pacing was right
my timing was perfect
My speed was good
On my pace, I checked
The dog close behind
Fangs snapped at my heel
Just as I leaped
Her teeth I did feel
The flesh of my calf
punctured with pops
I grimaced in flight
My flesh locked in her chops
My mass it did pass
Over the fence of chain link
The teeth of that dog left
Scars of bright pink
As I dropped top the sidewalk
The dog left behind
My life it was spared
I thanked God, so kind
A lesson I learned
About dogs and my friend
When a bitch does attack
Jay’s help he won’t lend
Ken Goree
Sorry Jay, but this is how I remember it. And I think I have it pretty close to the actual event. I do have to admit, as we sped away from the neighborhood, suddenly noticing that the car wasn’t as cool as we first thought, we did laugh about the whole situation. I wasn’t laughing quite as hard, though. I was busy trying to stop the bleeding.
I’ll tell you son
I opened a gate
And found no fun
Shopping on Craigslist
Is sometimes quite bright
Other times
It can bring on a fright
Jay needed a car
One with much muscle
That shouldn’t have been tough
I’d no idea I would tussle
We headed for Lynnwood
A Dodge Challenger to see
It wasn’t too pricey
Yet far from free
The house looked deserted
A meth lab by look
I saw the car Jay wanted
Parked off in a nook
So I opened the gate
And to the door went
I knocked on the door
Avoiding the dent
While still on the landing
A movement I spied
A black and red dog
I had just eyed
A Doberman Pinscher
Can be quite frightening
Jay thought the same
And departed like lightning
It was a male
So I wasn’t too worried
I laughed at Jay
For the way that he scurried
The dog came to me
A-wagging his stub
He was so friendly
Him, I couldn’t snub
On the door I did knock
Once more for good measure
Jay’s cowardess, at
I chuckled with pleasure
Then once again
That movement I spied
A red and black dog
I almost cried
This one was different
It wasn’t a he
The mate of the other
A new mother, she
I knew from close looking
Through preceding years
Of vicious dog mommies
It had rekindled old fears
I held myself frozen
Doing math in my head
I was betting on if
Would I escape if I fled
My normal tactic
Would most likely have been
To tell Jay to run
Knowing she’d seek his skin
Unfortunately then
My plans had been foiled
Jay had run early
His undies unsoiled
The long moment of tension
It finally broke
She charged right at me
Though I did not provoke
Her teeth came in low
But I bolted high
I sprinted for fence
And prayed to the sky
Twenty yards left to go
To the gate open wide
Then Jay did close it
I almost cried
He saw me coming
But the dog he saw too
So he closed the gate
That’s what he did do
The fence was a low one
Three feet, maybe four
I hoped I could hurdle
I hurdled before
I focused on goal
I accelerated
I didn’t know
To what I was fated
My pacing was right
my timing was perfect
My speed was good
On my pace, I checked
The dog close behind
Fangs snapped at my heel
Just as I leaped
Her teeth I did feel
The flesh of my calf
punctured with pops
I grimaced in flight
My flesh locked in her chops
My mass it did pass
Over the fence of chain link
The teeth of that dog left
Scars of bright pink
As I dropped top the sidewalk
The dog left behind
My life it was spared
I thanked God, so kind
A lesson I learned
About dogs and my friend
When a bitch does attack
Jay’s help he won’t lend
Ken Goree
Sorry Jay, but this is how I remember it. And I think I have it pretty close to the actual event. I do have to admit, as we sped away from the neighborhood, suddenly noticing that the car wasn’t as cool as we first thought, we did laugh about the whole situation. I wasn’t laughing quite as hard, though. I was busy trying to stop the bleeding.
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